Why will I write such a post? Because someone just tried to ask for a loan. I think you just can't be too nice to some people, as this will become an opportunity for them to ask for a loan. And hate it hate it hate it!!!
And especially when it's not asked in a nice tone of voice. Hey you!! You are asking for a loan... not demanding a
repayment!
Please use the following guidelines when asking for a loan in future. However, it does not guarantee a success. It is basic courtesy to ask nicely..... coz you are asking someone for a
F.A.V.O.U.R.!
Step 1: Smile :) If you can't smile, please try to put on a fake one even if you have to.
Step 2: Be apologetic (this is important) and say.. Erm.. I really need your help. Can you lend me $20? (or whatever amount you need)
Step 3: Quickly also say... I'll repay you by [date]. (My preferred date of repayment is - 'first thing in the morning tomorrow'. But if you can't, please tell me a date that is A.S.A.P. Do not..DO NOT wait to be asked 'when will you return this money to me?' Tell me the date before I ask that question. And make sure the date is not too far away.)
Step 4: I'll be nagging and saying things you don't like to hear, like wah lau.. I need to take taxi in the morning tomorrow.. now you take my $20 then I have to go to the ATM to draw.. etc. You can say 'sorry, it won't happen again in future'. Please do not say.... I'll be returning you the money in 3 days what.... Did you understand what I said? I have to take taxi in the morning TOMORROW! It's not 3 days later.
So, at this point, if you have nothing better to say please S.T.F.U.
Step 5: And don't forget to say 'Thank You'. And reassure me again that they money will be returned to me by [date].
Step 6: Make sure you return the $$ by [date]. Else you can be assured that the whole world will know about it. Although most of the time before the money is returned, the whole world would have known about it already. Usually I'll tell the people that I tell ....'I tell you something, but you pretend you don't know, ok?'
Step 7: Due Date: Please return money. Do not wait for me to call or ask. Because I always want to be the Ms Nice even if I'm faking it! I won't be nice if I don't see the $$. Please read Step 6 again for the consequences.
